I'm reading "Awakening the Buddha Within" right now and I came across a part in the book the other day that resonated with me, "In Buddhism, there is a rather unique word that translates as 'suchness'. It means vital, living truth itself, here and now, right before our very eyes-- the 'isness' of things exactly as they are" (69). The author goes on to talk about finding the place within ourselves that is "the ultimate refuge, the ultimate practice of letting go-- the art of allowing things to be as they are" (70). Such a simple idea, to allow things to be as they are, and yet so hard to do, really. Such a short and nifty new word-- isness-- and yet heavy with meaning.
I began to think of my own "isness", and how I deal with it... weekly, daily, by the minute. Do I notice things as they are? Or do I try to cover them up? Or run from them? Pretend they aren't happening? Do I push back against those things? Or do I just let them be? Is there joy in the noticing, when I do notice? I began then to think about all of the people in my life, family members, friends, coworkers... and how they deal with their own "isness". The next thing I knew, I found myself on a tangent of wondering about other people on the planet, entire countries and continents and whether or not they've mastered "the art of allowing things to be as they are". As I thought more about this idea, I realized that often, for many people, we are ok with things as they are as long as those things make us feel good and comfortable. It is only when the things that are cause us pain, suffering and discomfort that we begin to have problems with them.
One of the reasons I started this blog was to explore the state of life without wine, having come to the conclusion that one of my main default ways of dealing with things as they are was to meet friends in a lounge and order a crisp white, or two, or three. Some days more. The wine blurred the edges of things as they are, and this was especially welcome when those things resulted in uncomfortable feelings. When I didn't like things as they were, I had a ready solution. I could blot out my own isness. I definitely wasn't allowing things to be as they are- not without reacting to them anyway. Because it is one thing to notice things exactly as they are, and to not dress them up or down to suit your whims, but it is quite another to accept those things and to choose not to react to them.
A lot of this seems to be about acceptance and nonreaction, and I think this is the hardest part. This is all within reason of course. I'm not advocating that we accept and refuse to react to mistreatment, abuse or other unhealthy situations. What I'm talking about here is the grey, that place between the black and white, between the highs and lows, that place where most of life and living takes place... maybe this is the "isness". There is a quiet power and groundedness in both accepting things as they are as well as choosing to not react to them in that moment, in just letting things be, and in noticing. I guess if you can do this, then you may well be on the road to inner peace. Enlightened beings have known this for thousands of years, and it's not like they have kept this a secret from the rest of us. But at the end of the day, allowing things to be as they are, without reacting to them is just plain hard. Often. For many people.
I'm a ways away from achieving this on a regular basis, but I am trying, and I believe I'm making progress. It gets easier as I get older, for many reasons. One of my main tools is meditation, and I definitely wouldn't be where I am in terms of my own personal growth if I didn't have that. So I will continue to sit still, in the dark, breathing in and out, sitting with my "isness" and trying my best to accept it and not to react, because I know deep down that there is wisdom in all of that. I just know.
No comments:
Post a Comment